Virtually Free Stuff

Or I suppose Free Virtual Stuff is more accurate. Back to the point.

You asked for it. You got it. Toyota. (That reference is a little more obscure so I’ll offer $10,000 virtual dollars to the first person to name it.) Actually, only one person asked for it but I’ll offer it to all of you just the same.

What is it? You ask.

Only the most great, collasally stupendous thing ever! Something you’ll love an cherish for the rest of your days. Something that you’ll want to share with all your friends and neighbors, something so great you’ll wonder how you ever lived without it.

Actually I’m finding now, that I feel a little silly for having talked it up so much. What if you don’t like it? Or what if you do like it but it’s not that big of a deal? Maybe I should have downplayed instead. Maybe if I didn’t act like it was that big of a deal then once you got it (If you even want it) you’d be blown away but not necessarily because it’s so good, just because it’s pretty good but you had no expectations. Overthink much?

Well, what I’m offering is *Deep Breath* my book. (Technically it’s a manuscript but who’s counting?)

For any of you interested, I’m offering a virtual copy of On The Table a novel I wrote about three years ago.

On the Table is a cozy mystery about young widowed mother who works at a childrens’ hospital and is blamed for the near death of a five-year-old patient. As she tries to clear her name she also finds herself caught up in her sister’s problems with a premature baby, an interesting love triangle and threats on something more important than her life, the safety of her only son.

It’s really good (my daddy told me so) and even kind of funny. I like it and I’m really proud of it and I thought I’d offer it to anyone who wants it. (Please please, don’t steal it. I’d be really sad and I’m sure I’d cry. But I’m gonna be honest, if you stole it and got it published there would be a part of me that was just proud that I had written something proved publishable even if it didn’t have my name on it anymore.) I was going to post the first few chapters on another page here but I haven’t worked out how to do that yet so for now just leave me a comment and I’ll email it to you and then you can gush about how good it is and what a talented writer I am and nominate me for a Pulitzer prize.

Thank you and goodnight.

PS Yes, I know that they don’t give Pulitzers for books. I don’t think.

PPS In an effort not to clog inboxes I only email half at a time so when you’ve finished the first half please feel free to contact me to find out what happens… if you want.

PPPS In case the fabulous writing on the blog wasn’t enough to convince you that you want to read it, you can find the first nine chapters loaded up and ready for your viewing here.

2 Comments (+add yours?)

  1. Evitafjord
    Nov 06, 2008 @ 12:18:38

    You’ve already deleted the answer to the reference, right? Someone surely already answered it.

    Forget Paris.

    Now I want to watch that movie. I love that movie.

  2. John Griffith
    Feb 24, 2011 @ 13:27:40

    That sounds like a great plot for a novel, but I think that was a long lost epsiode of Family Matters. I want to read it!! 🙂

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