From the Mouths of Babes

Yesterday the Pea was on dish duty. He had washed all the dishes in the sink but none of the stuff stacked on the counter around the sink.

Me: Pea, the dishes are not done.

Pea: I don’t care.

Me: Yes, but I care and I’m the mom so mine’s the caring that matters.

Why is it that my children think that the fact that they don’t care about things being messy has the slightest bearing on whether they need to clean it?


The other day in the midst of a fight with her father, the Princess asked why she should respect him, specifically what he had ever done to earn her respect.

Umm, let’s start with putting a roof over your head and food in your mouth for the last 11+ years and move on from there shall we?

Aren’t the tag lines that kids learn as they head in to teendom fun?!



If you tell your daughter that she does not have to go to school but that she may not be in the house for the 8 hours that she would be at school (and you be sure that you’ve got her iPod in your pocket) and it’s cold and rainy outside it will only take her about 15 minutes to give up and go to school.

(I wonder how that scene will play out in her movie?)

Be My Valentine

I’m thinking of putting together a calendar of how my kids “celebrate” different holidays, something like this: For Valentine’s day the Princess and the Pea empty all of the tissue boxes in the storage room of all their tissues so that they can make valentine boxes for school.

Cute huh?

When They’re Helping Mom’s Happy

My life (or at least my kitchen) has been completely transformed by assigning the Princess and the Pea two days per week each of dish duty.

Best. Decision. Ever!

I’m Just Sucker With No Self Esteem

A few thoughts:

I got an email today from one of my friends at work who’s also sort of my boss (it’s complicated).  He sent it to me and another guy who had been having an email discussion about something that didn’t get done by the people that it should have and… anyway it was pretty dumb and it was something that I was done with.  The email that I got this morning was telling us to drop it.  It wasn’t aggressively worded or unkind.  And yet, I feel like a puppy who’s been slapped. I find myself wanting to send an email saying “I was done with it anyways so nanny nanny nanny” or ” maybe just pointing to the other guy and saying “he started it” or… I don’t know, it’s dumb and I’m over it.  (But I did think it was funny how I initially reacted.)

I was reading some of Elizabeth Smart’s testimony in court yesterday (holy crow, the crap that girl had to go through…) there was a statement in there that through the whole thing she always knew that there were people who loved her and that she was a person of worth.  Say what you want about the Smarts but they had them some crazy effective family home evenings in their home.

Lately the Princess has been very sweet, kind and mostly reasonable.  Now I know that kids go back and forth between testing boundaries (and just generally driving their parents nuts) and living comfortably within those boundaries so this turn of events may be totally organic but I can’t help but give at least some of the credit to her current best friend Katie.  It’s not that Katie is some amazing perfect child, I occasionally find her to be very annoying and an insufferable know it all, but she does have one thing going for her.  She’s one of those kids who’s perfectly happy being who she is, and more importantly I think for little girls, being the age that she is.  Before this the Princess was spending a lot of time with a girl who was  a year older than her and who herself wanted to be older than she was.  I think that just makes for a lot of angst.  But when you accept where you are and just have fun with it it makes you a much more pleasant person.  (There might be a life lesson there…)

Happy Wednesday Everyone.

The End is Near

I hope you have your food storage in order because you’re going to need it.  Soon. 

How soon? You ask.

Well, no one knows the day or the hour but I’ve been watching the signs and I’d say you’d better make sure you have enough Morning Moo for the family within the next few days, a week at the most.

How do I know? Well, let me tell you.

I went hiking today. And if that’s not a sign of the end of days I don’t know what is.

For those of you who don’t know me very well or who haven’t known me for more than a year, let me ‘splain.  I’m not really what you would call the outdoorsy type.  I was raised with the belief that mankind had been through thousands of years of technological advances so that I wouldn’t have to sleep on the ground, or share my meals with the flies or *ahem* cook over an open flame (my father was resistant even to grilling) and so that I could have things like indoor plumbing and computers.  And that’s a belief that I proudly held for years.

Until this year when I made a resolution to take my family, my kids specifically, on some kind of vacation this year.  To begin with I was thinking Disney and then I looked up prices for Disney.  So then I was thinking … I don’t know, something else but well, frankly I couldn’t afford that either.  You know what I could afford?  Camping.  So I took a deep breath; got off my high horse (figuratively as I’ve never actually ridden a horse) and took the kids camping.  We’ve been twice and with the notable exception of the lantern attack it’s gone really well.  Well enough that we were planning on going again this weekend, to a campground that’s far(ish) away, for two nights.  This is serious commitment people!

Unfortunately, the Infantile Delinquent choose Wednesday night to spend puking and Thursday to be feverish and snuggly (which is semi-delightful for a mom but mostly really sad.) Not to be outdone, The Baby spent the majority of Thursday night screaming and  when Sean broke down and took him in to the ER (at about 2:30 this morning) we discovered that he had two enormous ulcers running down his throat (apparently this is somewhat common and not a sign of anything other than a lot of pain for the next few days).  We got him some meds and his pain seems to be fairly well managed but there wass no way I was taking him camping, especially not someplace far(ish) from home, with something like that going on.

So camping’s out at least for tonight, but my kids have just been sitting around the house for three weeks.  And while that’s really short for a summer break (as previously discussed) it’s plenty of time for the intake of Suite Life on Deck to reach critical levels.  I had to get them out of the house.  I had to get out of the house.  And because Sean hasn’t been paid in about a month (and because I’m cheap and we had already paid for a campsite that we’re not using) it had to be something free.

Walking’s free.

So I took my two oldest kids and we hiked.  We did the Silver Lake loop and just like the reviews I read, it was steep (and that sucked) but actually, it wasn’t too bad.  The kids whined a fair amount and they were each reduced to tears at least once, but I figure that’s about par for the course.  It’s four(ish) miles and we did it in a little under three hours and no one died or even ended up very seriously maimed.  So altogether I’m calling it a win.

But seriously, if I were you I’d make sure I had my affairs in order.  Just in case.


Since you asked:

102_1171 If you look close you can see the cut from the lantern-> 102_1170102_1168 Poor sick Baby 102_1177

Forever in Mom Jeans

There are some things I don’t mind about getting older, I care a lot less about what people think of me, I’m in charge of making dinner so I don’t have to suffer through meals that I don’t like (in theory at least, this doesn’t always seem to work out), I’m in charge of my own bed time.  But I went on a field trip with the Princess on Tuesday and I gotta tell you, I just don’t know when I got to be so old.

The field trip was a “rewards” activity for all the kids in the school who are consistently well behaved (the Pea did NOT go on this field trip) and it was at a local “fun center” kind of place.  The kids skated, and rode the bumper cars and rode the little rides and I followed along and watched.  Which was fine.  So then the Princess and her two little friends wanted to go on one of those octopus kind of rides, you know, the ones with multiple arms and it lifts and spins around and the individual cars can spin as well.  This used to be my favorite kind of ride.  Through my early teen years I was terrified of actual coasters so when I went to Kings Dominion (the local amusement park) I stuck with the spinney rides.  And I never had a moment’s problem.

Yesterday, as we were waiting in line for the ride one of the Princess’s friends asked me if I was going to be OK on the ride.  Actually, “you’re not going to get sick like my dad does are you?” was what she asked.  And I thought, certainly not, I love these rides.  And surely, I’m not as old and infirm as your father.

So our turn came and we got in our little car and as we were waiting for the gal who was running the ride to come over and lock our door the little girls were spinning the car,  and spinning the car, and spinning the car.  And it became very obvious that if I rode this ride things were not going to end well.

I gave the girls the choice.  I could ride with them and they could NOT spin the car, or I could get out and watch.

And I have to say that the ride didn’t even really look all that fun.

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