And the Gold Medal Goes To…

I noticed the other day that I’m way too competitive.   I don’t play sports, I’m not a gamer, I don’t really do anything that could be called competition, except live.  But in the course of living I meet people, make friends, form acquaintances, hear the news of others and suddenly I’m Suzie competitive.

What’s that? Cheryl‘s pregnant with her 5th kid?  I only have four, I could be just as good of a mother as Cheryl, maybe I should have another kid, you know, just to prove it.  Because somehow child bearing and raising is a competition.

Kate homeschools her kids.  Sure she doesn’t have to work full time outside of her home in order to feed her kids but I should be able to homeschool too, I mean if Kate does it… Maybe if I was willing to be flexible and not sleep all day after I work  a night shift, maybe I could work in homeschooling.

What’s that?  ByTheLbs is vacationing in Hawaii?  Maybe I should take the money I have in savings and hit the beach, I meant that’s not what I saved it for but, well, I’ve never been to Hawaii and vacationing, surely vacationing is a competition.

Look how well behaved Catherine’s kids are.  Her three year old would never yell “I hate you” at her as she walked up to the pulpit to say the closing prayer in sacrament meeting. (No, I’m not kidding, you haven’t been here long have you?)  Maybe I should… well, I don’t have any idea what I should do to compete in this arena (aside from recognizing that her children and my children are, you know, different children.)

And look at all these girls having their babies without medication.  I mean I did it once but surely I could have done it more than once.  (How’s that for a STUPID thought?)

And both Melanie and Kate had twins, maybe I could have twins naturally that would really show ’em.  And look how long Becky’s hair is (because hair length, absolutely a competition) and look at Angela’s cute clothes, oh and the Joneses got a new boat, and you know I have to keep up with the Joneses…

I mean, um, well…


9 Comments (+add yours?)

  1. Catherine
    Jun 22, 2009 @ 16:30:25

    Your three year old said the closing prayer in sacrament meeting! I think that’s gold medal worthy right there. End of competition.

  2. Alison Wonderland
    Jun 22, 2009 @ 16:41:45

    No, no, let me be clear. I said the prayer. My three year old just yelled “I hate you” at me as I walked up front.

  3. cheryl
    Jun 22, 2009 @ 18:15:00

    Having kids is totally a competition. And I win.

    Now, would you like to adopt a couple of mine for a decade or so?


  4. Janelle
    Jun 22, 2009 @ 23:34:07

    Your kid yelling I hate you while heading up to the pulpit must take the cake.

    It reminds me of the time we forgot to put diapers on Elizabeth (age 1.75) and when we noticed, we made such a big deal out of it, she decided it must be game and flashed everyone around us like a Can-Can girl. There was a lot of crying at church that day, crying while holding back giggles and hiding low behind the pew to laugh. We hauled her out to the car to get a new diaper on. But people still like to remind us of it. I just hope they forget at some point for her sake.

  5. Susan M
    Jun 23, 2009 @ 09:15:28

    Not to get all sexist on you, but I think this is a female thing. Men/boys are competitive about games and sports and blah blah. Us females get competitive about more important things. Ha.

  6. Melanie J
    Jun 23, 2009 @ 09:39:17

    Yeah, I hate this tendency in myself. It’s one of my main requirements in choosing a new neighborhood to move to next year: must be solidly middle class and in no way tempt me to compete over stupid things.

    Good luck to me with that one.

  7. madhousewife
    Jun 25, 2009 @ 08:23:20

    I’m glad we’re not competing over whose kids drive them crazier, because this week you would totally be going DOWN, Wonderland. 😀

  8. Chris Jones
    Jun 26, 2009 @ 20:22:42

    You’re kicking my butt at commenting on your siblings’ blogs, though, so there’s something.

    Someone smart once said “forget yourself and go to work.”

    Yeah, I can’t do it, either.

  9. Kate
    Jul 09, 2009 @ 13:30:53

    I find myself wondering if this isn’t an American phenomenon, though. I have this wacky mental image of a French woman saying, “My neighbor, Marie, has a spotless kitchen and two spotless children? Screw her, I’m fabulous!”

    But that’s just me.

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