One is the Loneliest Number

As I’ve mentioned before, I’m working on a new book.  I’m really excited about it and I think it’s going to be quite good for several different reasons one of which is that writing it has turned me into a needy author again.  It has reminded me of all the things I love and the one huge thing that I hate about writing.


I write something and I want to know if it works.  Is the desperation coming through?  How do you picture her?  Do you get that she’s a control freak?  Is that sentence too long?.  I come up with a good idea, a good plot twist and I want someone to tell me how brilliant I am.  You never saw that coming did you?   I have these interesting people walking around in my head and I want to introduce them to people that I know.

That is, of course, why I’m writing the book but that takes too long.  I want people to love them now.

It’s a good sign I think, a good thing, but it’s really irritating too.

As I wrote On the Table I’d send chapters to my good friend Jabe.  I wanted him to read them and email me back about how brilliant I was and how this was sure to be a million dollar book that I could then sell the movie rights to and make another couple mil.  He didn’t.  But there was part of me that just liked that I was sending it out there to someone.  That there was an audience even if I didn’t get a response.  I’m not doing that this time around.  (He says it’s too hard to read a book piecemeal like that.  I take that as a compliment.  Because I can.)  I’ve thought about posting it online as I write it but A) it’s far too rough to share and B) this book is a complete departure for me, I’m not sure enough about it, about how it fits together, to be able to share it, I have to go back and change things too much, it wouldn’t make sense.

So instead I’ve decided to just complain about the things that I want but I can’t or I won’t or I refuse to have.  Aren’t you glad you read my blog?


9 Comments (+add yours?)

  1. Melanie J
    Nov 11, 2008 @ 00:46:34

    I so, so feel you on this. With my first manuscript, I sent it out chapter by chapter to anyone I could think of that would agree to read it. This one, I’m almost a third of the way through and I’ve managed not to send it to anyone. I’m saving up until I get 25,000 words and then I’ll let myself send it to my sister and one of my other friends. But I completely understand that need for praise and feedback. I’m a total praise junkie.

  2. LisAway
    Nov 11, 2008 @ 01:05:22

    I’m so glad you’ve got your muse back! I would beg you to let me read your book, but I already know I would only tell you how amazing it is. I’m not a good critic.

    But keep writing! I need to buy your book ASAP!

  3. Kristina
    Nov 11, 2008 @ 01:13:01

    Keep going! I know not everyone can write as awesome a book about a serial killer as I can, but I’m sure yours will be pretty close.

  4. Annette
    Nov 11, 2008 @ 08:24:55

    Amen! I’m so grateful for my critique group. They’ll tell me how it is, good, bad, or ugly, a chapter at a time or a whole book at a time. So many writers don’t get that they need feedback. You’re ahead of the pack already.

  5. Alison @ hairlinefracture
    Nov 11, 2008 @ 11:42:21

    Good for you. I’m writing fiction again after a 6-year break and holy crap, it’s hard. But I’m glad I’m doing it, even if I have to force myself to start every day.

  6. bythelbs
    Nov 11, 2008 @ 18:35:26


  7. Sue
    Nov 13, 2008 @ 00:41:22

    Hey, I’ve got an idea. You could start a fake blog, under an assumed name, and post all of your crappiest stuff there.


    Or, um, NOT.

  8. Trackback: I Need To Stop Blogging in the Middle of the Night « Alison Wonderland
  9. Pink Ink
    Nov 15, 2008 @ 21:18:21

    I like Sue’s idea :-).

    I am in a writer’s group right now, and I’m giving my story piecemeal (50 pages) every month. I don’t know if my group is getting the big picture, but it’s working so far.

    I can’t do by the chapter, though. I like revising it at least once before I have someone else read it.

    Sounds like this one is a keeper. Good luck!!

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